Morning training at the Kampung.

Hanged out with Fitri the Indonesian couchsurfer before she returns home in the morning. I think I made her walk a lot.

Met Kephren and Chewy at night and I foresee more things happening in June for SPS. Sending out emails and emails.

Looking at the list of things to do and I feel like following up with the name cards from GGBF is not a priority this week.

Like I have to leave the house in 5 hours time now.

———-

At the morning training, Chris pointed out my body language was not assertive enough. I wanted to tell him it’s a kindergarten training we were training for, but then it’s a training for general facilitation skills, so I didn’t. To be fair, his trainings are helpful. It’s just not me to be assertive with kids. And I don’t think the kids had a problem with that.

Last year, there was one particular school we went to, and within the first 30 mins I noticed the teacher kept picking on this boy J. I say “picking” on because I thought the teacher was too assertive with this boy, like he had a problem. For some reason, he was always called out. For not joining the rest of the class. For talking to his friends. I think he even had a time-out. But J and I clicked. He doesn’t join the class because he prefers not to- what’s wrong with that. He talks to his friends, but it’s not like he’s disturbing them- he asks if he can button their shirt up or tie their shoe lace. That lesson, he gave me a card before I left class. The next time I came, he already had a card prepared for me.  With drawings of butterfly and with his name. Perhaps it’s just me, but I care about the kid more than I cared about taking care of the rest of the class. And to me that was more important- being able to connect without being assertive.

But now I think the long days past two weeks is making me tired and grumpy and more assertive than usual especially to M. I find myself demanding a lot and wanting to have things my way.

———-

I looked at my schedule this week, last week, last last week, last last last week, and I asked myself why. What is the purpose of all these events and meetups when I could have started a full time job back in January.

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